Friday, February 19, 2010

Creatives not cunts?

I have to disagree with my angry friend below.

I don't think that all creatives are necessarily cunts. I think some of them are ok, but I think that circumstances force them to act like cunts.

Most people become creatives for personal reasons, not connected to their aptitude for the job.

Basically, they'd like to get laid a lot more. More than most people, male or female. Not because they're all raging horn-dogs, although some of them undoubtedly are (or like to think they, even though many of them are too tired after a day spent writing ads for catfood to do any actual fucking), but because having a lot of sex is the easiest way of telling yourself that you're well liked by the people around you.

One way of drawing attention to yourself, so you can do more fucking, is being creative in public.

Look at Prince. Very creative. Does a lot of fucking. But which came first? Would he have spent so much of his life, pumping away, like a priapic performing dwarf in the retinue of a decadent emperor, if he'd not written Raspberry Beret? Did he write Raspberry Beret for that reason? Or Little Red Corvette? Both songs about being picked up by dominant women whilst doing two-bit low-paid jobs?

But back to creatives.

Basically, they want the acclaim (and the hot cock or poon) that comes from being creative in public, but they don't have the stamina that will see them through to the creation of a really excellent album or novel or film. Or even a low-charting novelty grime record.

And the reason that they don't have the stamina to do that, is that they are all massive egotists. Hence the infantile need for physical love. The problem with being a huge egotist, is that it makes it very hard to do anything that you're not immediately good at. And doing something like learning to be a concert pianist or a playwright or a novelist means not being good at it for a really long time.

If you write a really good ad, it takes seconds. Ok, ages of sitting about, reading blogs, but then one moment of insight and bam - the whole production mechanism kicks in and the huge golden hand drops out of the ceiling to pat you on the head.

All the baubles and production company lunches and business class flights are just part of this mechanism.

Well, you might say, advertising creatives have a tough time because people mess with their ads.

Poor diddums. But we, I mean they, do not have to go more than a couple of weeks alone with their project, with just their self-belief to drive them on, ever really. And that is the bit of making real art that drives real artists howling fucking mad.

The wonderful thing about capitalism is that there is a niche for exactly this type of personality, in a creative department of an ad agency.

So in my opinion, they're not cunts. They're merely terrified, priapic, egotistical pseudo artists.

But then, what's another word for a priapic, egotistical pseudo artist?

5 comments:

John said...

No, I'm definately a cunt. 1000% If I uttered even a fraction of the deluded pish that floated between my ears each day I'd be kicked to death, and blamed for everything that was ever wrong with the human race. Full stop.

Anonymous said...

This blog is hanging out the back.

Anonymous said...

So's your mum

Anonymous said...

dad go home your drunk

Unknown said...

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